Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Untamed Melody

"Mom, will you get me something to drink?"...."Sure"...."Well then why are you still sitting on your tushy?"
"Why am I looking at a bunch of weird ladies in their bras?"(Playtex commercial on tv)
"It's my turn, then Sam's, then my turn, then Tanner's, then my turn, that's how it works!"
"I don't know how to do my homework!!"(before he even looked at it)sob, sob.
These are some of the melodies being sung in our choir today. The conductor was able to enjoy some retail therapy today only to return and hear the off key and sometimes sour notes of her musical clan. Doe, Ray, Me(Do you think) Fa So La Tee Doe(you get a day off??!!) The conductor began singing soprano, her voice pitchy with unflattering rifts. Thankfully the curtain closed on tonight's follies with a musical rest of at least 8 measures(hours). Thank you Ladies and Gentlemen for coming out to see us, Have a wonderful night.

Monday, April 13, 2009

I knew this story before it was on Oprah


Dana was on Oprah and I MISSED IT! I just finished and returned today, one of the most moving, real and intimate stories I have ever read. A Journal for Jordan. This journal is written by a father to his son before and after his birth. His mother Dana Canedy wrote the book, including her own entries for their son, Jordan. She is a Pulitzer Prize-Winning Writer and as of today a guest on Oprah. The intensity, intimacy and fullness of the love she had for her husband and he for her, are undeniable. I regret that I never wrote that story for our boys. How their father and I met. How I fell in love with him through lengthy letters and phone calls while he was in the military and how a weekend visit proposal set in motion the story of our lives as a family.
Charles, Jordan's father: "Remember who taught you to speak, to walk and to be a gentleman, he wrote to Jordan in his journal. These are your first teachers, my little prince. Protect them, embrace them and always treat them like a queen. "
"Be humble about your accomplishments, work harder than the man next to you, it is all right for boys to cry. Sometimes crying can release a lot of pain and stress. Never be ashamed to cry. It has nothing to do with your manhood."(exerpts from the book)
Can you imagine how our society would differ if all fathers imparted this type of wisdom to their sons? If all wives reveered their husbands this way: "Sometimes you get lucky and catch a rainbow."
I don't want to spoil the book for you I WANT YOU TO READ IT! How would your level of interest change if I told you Charles died a military hero in Iraq and only met and spent 2 weeks with his son while home on leave..from the war....and never came home again.(This isn't a spoiler, you probably learned this on Oprah) Take a peek. Realize how fortunate you are to have a partner walking beside you in this journey of parenthood. How blessed you are to feel his touch.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Women are Crazy "sometimes"


It occurred to me today why my husband thinks that I am "sometimes"...crazy. I am not indecisive, in fact indecisiveness is a pet peeve of mine. I am an impatient, "say what you mean!" personality. However, there are "sometimes" moments in my life. Like today.


I have a set of wine glasses that I use for entertaining or quiet times with my husband. Occasionally, I will use them at the dinner table with special dinnerware, candles, the whole nine! I once read, you should never do something for a friend that you don't do for your own family, and I've made it a rule of thumb in my hostessing ritual. It thrills the boys when they see the beautifully set table and ask "who's coming over?" and I say..."No One!, we're celebrating us!!" We recently had such a night, same blessed, predictable result. If your still following me, I have a point....I am "sometimes" crazy. I walk into the kitchen tonight to see said wine glass filled with milk. "Who got the wine glass down?" Husband replies "I did". I didn't COMPLETELY over-react when he said "I thought it was okay because you let them use them for dinner", but I did react and said well it is okay, "sometimes"! (you know, when I say so!) To his logical, black and white mind, I am "nuts!", it's just a glass.


As I mentioned yesterday, we had a sheep who passed away, he was another "sometimes". I don't have an inherent gravitation toward animals. I complain about the stupidity of our now, four dogs and the moodiness of our cat. But "sometimes" a sweet, woolly, newborn lamb will tug at the heartstrings..... and drives the husband "nuts". "I can't believe you have no compassion for a dog but you love this sheep who poops on the porch every time we let him out, that's crazy!" he said.


Not wanting to bore you with my attention to detail I will list some of my other contradictions with bullets, my poor husband!


  • I like a clean, organized home but when I'm feeling creative, it "sometimes" looks like a fabric/craft store exploded. You should see my sewing closet..crazy!


  • I love fashion and clothing. I worked as a hair stylist before children, I design and sell purses but my poor husband sees more ponytails and jogging pants than one person should..crazy!


  • I love when my husband listens to my long stories or rants but "sometimes" when he's speaking I insist he just gives me "the bottom line".....crazy(and rude)!


  • I shine my sink several times a day with window cleaner but I could "sometimes" care less if my windows are washed(who can keep up with all those fingerprints anyway)...crazy.


These are only the ones that I am not completely embarrassed to share. Dear husband, I am sorry. I guess it is a women's prerogative to change her mind and contradict herself but it is a man's right to be annoyed by it. Thank you for always treating my "sometimes" as cute idiosyncrasies instead of intolerable gray in your black and white world. I love you.

Betty had a little lamb



This has been an almost very sad and very sad week so far in this house. First of all it's spring break in Ohio, interpreted to out of staters, an invitation for snow and rain. Trailing behind this wave of weather oxymoron, a family member of the feline species met the rubber of our neighbors vehicle. She survived, thankfully. Imagine how quickly the words I said just 2 weeks ago "I don't care if she runs outside again, maybe she'll get hit by a car!" came back to me. I saw the fear in my children's faces as we searched for her because she was hiding after her little scare and thought "now i really am a bad mom!". I, only half, jokingly wished my cat would be hit by a car w/o any regard of how much sadness that would bring to my children. Somehow over the past 3 years we have accumulated 2 beagles and a labrador retriever(kept outside), a sheep(also outside, ha!) a cat and most recently a puppy who is STILL not house broken! I would never mistreat an animal but I am not an animal lover. Yet somehow our family had six pets. Now I will admit, the ONE I did want was the sheep. I've always wanted one. I love the precious curls of their wool between my fingers. My dad started raising them about 2 years ago. When a mother has more than 1 lamb she may not feed them, as the case of "Sneakers". Named for his white hooves. To me, that meant "Sneakers" had to come home with us. The boys and I loved him! We fed him from a bottle and walked him on a leash. He was such a sweetie. Yesterday for no apparent reason he stopped eating. By this evening he wouldn't stand. Hours later, he died....
My 2 oldest boys are spending the night at Grandma's, so they are unaware. My youngest knows but he doesn't understand the finality of death yet. His innocence is bliss. A simple hug and final pat on the head would suffice for him. Tomorrow, however, we will have to bring the boys home from a fun overnight-er and hit them in the face with the sorrow of laying their dear pet to rest. A lamb. Do any of you find this overwhelmingly ironic that our lamb has died the week of Easter? As I sat beside this lamb watching him what seemed like a slow death, I felt such sadness and pain. It hit me that this animal, although dear to us, is a mere beast. Can you imagine how the Father must have felt watching his spotless Lamb die for our sins? When we brought "Sneakers" home, I was enthusiastic at the opportunity he gave me to teach my sons more about the Lamb, I just didn't think it would end this way, at this time. I am dreading the breaking of my sons hearts. I will cherish the honor of catching their tears. I won't have the perfect words. I will be thankful for the Lamb who died for me and loves me anyway.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

The Momma Clause(Claws)


Momma bears have an instinctive desire to protect their cubs. This momma bear is feeling very instinctive. Kids can be so cruel. My oldest son Tanner is what the world would say is on the "chubby side". Although we encourage play and healthy eating, genetics and asthma meds contribute to his extra weight.

He's a little slower when he runs and a target of fore mentioned cruelty. We make it part of our purpose to assure him that he is "fearfully and wonderfully made" and that God made him with a heart like no one else's. He is unique and accepted, by us and a perfect, loving Creator.

He's playing baseball again this year and with every season comes new teammates. One in particular has caused this momma's claws to be exposed. I never want to be a mom who fights her cubs battles but there is clause in this rule that makes an exception. Every day at school he has to stand on his own and learn how to let things roll of his back and remember to embrace who he is. But when I am with him I have a right and a responsibility to protect him: The Momma Clause. As I sat watching him practice, I could see "George" teasing Tanner and once even heard him call Tanner stupid when he fielded the ball and became flustered and did not know what to do with the ball once it landed in his mitt. Then the climax..."Your a Fatty!" said "George". I thought I would supernaturally fly over the fence and pounce this fierce predator...but I didn't. I could see the pain in my son's face and the Momma Clause went into effect. However, seeing as I despise conflict, I told my husband, aka Pappa Bear. The leader of our den doesn't share my fear of confrontation. Hopefully now, the rules of the wilderness will be tamed.....before the Momma Clause is initiated fully and the Momma Claws are unleashed.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Shameless Plugging


More of my dreams are coming true. Two days ago I opened my webstore, selling my purses online! I am so excited! I have already sold my purses to aquaintances in other states and now I will be able to spread my brand across the nation much easier. Check out my store http://www.bugotot.etsy.com. I just had to take this opportunity for self-promotion. Thanks for allowing me to indulge!