Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Jon & Kate...It's not a riddle


What do you call 2 people who have made their world revolve around their children for the sake of riches and seem surprised that their marriage fell apart?
It's not a riddle, it's real(ality TV)...Jon & Kate.
I am going to go on a completely judgemental rant but they put themselves into my living room (not to mention the grocery checkout and the airwaves in my car all day long)so therefore open to my criticism...right?
I don't care if you have 1 child or 8, making a marriage work is exactly that....work. Work that you do on purpose. Purposefully considering your spouse and meeting each others needs. Finding time to connect beyond the commonality of the children you share. We all fall into seasons where the kids occupy the majority of our time and it's easy to be swept up in the wind of that season and loose focus of your center and foundation. However if you purposefully choose not to let the wind to carry you away....it won't. Spouses united by God and led by his example is the biggest gift you can give your children. Among friends and acquaintances, I have seen this happen before. Obviously, divorce is not new. Parents feel it unnecessary or guilt ridden when it comes to focusing on each other. C'mon, if you love and respect your spouse, your children are not neglected, they are blessed. Setting aside time for the love of your life allows your children to understand and replicate healthy, loving relationships...with friends, family and someday their own spouse.
Kate says she "doesn't want to be alone", did she ever consider that epiphany over the past 5 years she berated Jon for everyone to see? She stepped out of her role as a wife and effeminated her husband.
Jon says " he's sad and excited at the same time. sad that things ended the way they did but excited for his new life" Why wasn't he excited about his role as husband and father? He was clearly born with a spine, why didn't he use it?
They both say "I'll always love Jon/Kate as the father/mother of my children" What about simply loving the mother/father?
I am so infuriated by these two. I understand the labor of having 8 children is beyond my fathom however I feel no empathy to either. While they orbit the planet of Children, they still manage to be completely self involved. Kate and her hair and Jon and his "new life" will take turns living in the "kids' house" (are you kidding me? Jon & Kate were just guests? Can you say future entitlement issues?) adding further to the confusion these poor kids are experiencing. But "the show must go on"? Neither Jon nor Kate even paused to think that maybe they should withdraw from the limelight(maybe then they wouldn't have paparazzi issues), protect their children, and at least attempt to rebuild their relationship. UGHH!!! I could go on forever.
Bottom line. Talk to your spouse. Respect your spouse. Love your spouse. Consider your Spouse.
Your kids will thank you.

Friday, June 19, 2009

I'm losing!

Well here it is.....I've lost 17 lbs. I'm proud of that but I am stuck and frustrated. Not that 17 isn't an accomplishment because I know that it is, but attaining good health is sometimes tiring and just plain boring! Healthy eating does not include fried mozzarella, pizza(at least not the good kind), buffalo wings or bleu cheese dressing. I know, I know.......in moderation. However, I did go to the library today and checked out 6 different cookbooks so I'm finding some new motivation and I started yoga this week in addition to my walking. Did I mention I hate working out? I had to add a different type of exercise to pass this plateau...or so I'm told. But maybe -15 lbs later I'll agree but right now I'm going to complain....ok, I'm done.
While I was at the library though, I was saddened. Because of funding losses our small but incredible library will be closing two days a week! We love the library! They had already cut hours but it didn't match the funding loss so now they will be closed on Wed and Fri. So sad. It's crazy to me that in this economic mess the one place that offers free entertainment and virtually endless reading resources would be the one of the first cut made by our legislature. Families like mine are always looking for inexpensive or free fun...ESPECIALLY NOW! If only Mommy's made the rules.
Why do I stay up so late? Tomorrow I will complain about the earliness of my risers.
I can't sleep because I have this idea....a really good idea. It's a non-profit. In these financially tough times can generosity and charity prevail? It's on my mind. If it comes to fruition a community can be changed. I'd tell you what it is...but then I'd have to kill ya. It's on my mind and my heart. I will tell you when it's real. I'm brainstorming.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Blooming Where they are Planted


Okay, Okay, I'm not getting any better at keeping up with my blog. I'm reluctantly accepting that this is just part of the season that I am living. A season where the flowers grow so quickly and consume so much of my sunshine......but I have to enjoy their beauty while it's blooming. Before I know it their roots will outgrow the bed in which they are contained and will have to be transplanted to bloom and bring beauty to another landscape.....besides mine. I remember them as seedlings, dainty sprouts....now, budding perennials that grow bigger and more beautiful every year. The days of constant weeding, fertilizing, the right amount of watering, dirty hands working the soil are not over, but their maturity allows us more time just to enjoy their splendor...the most enjoyable season of a garden.......even if it is baseball season.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

"Friends influence the direction and quality of life"

Today, I wanted to move. Move somewhere, where we are strangers, to start new relationships, be somewhat anonymous. Growing up and then residing in a small town is quaint, close knit, quiet.....but also intrusive, haunting. Haunted by relationships past, mistakes made, hurt applied. Like when your at your son's baseball game and you see that "Mean Girl" from High School, a beautiful rose as always, but still with thorns. You know logically and biblically you should pray for her, love her but it seems like a waste. Even though, my God wore thorns to remove hers just as he did mine, it's tough. And so the wheels of my mind turn continuously, oiled by the hurtful past between us and the promise that leaving would make things so much easier because the slates would be clean, both mine and the people I would meet............
Then I came home to find a voicemail on the cell phone I forgot. Reminding me, life is precious, fragile, genuine friendships hold value. The recorded voice of a friend. Our mutual friend has had some health concerns which, as of now, are increased concerns. As I prayed for my friend, I was soothed. My focus had switched. From self-centered pity to pleading, selfless love over the wounds of my friend. Then to the soul of a "mean girl" who if faced with the same concerns would have no praying friends. There's no time to change the past, only love the now.
Our pastor made a comment in the message this past Sunday.."Friends influence the direction and quality of life" based on Proverbs 12:26 The righteous choose their friends carefully....
2009 has brought me new and blossoming friendships with Godly women and as today reflects they certainly influence my direction and definitely improve the quality of my life.