This is What Has Been in my Heart, Thus the 2 Week Hiatus

If you've read my blog, you know that over the past 6 months we have been churchless. We don't fit where we used to and aren't quite sure where we fit now. It has taken a toll. On me, my husband and my innocent children. Jerry and I were just talking tonight about without a (church)home, for the time being, we have to allow God to re-light that fire inside of us where we are. Our devotion time has gone from suffering to non-existent. We feel a little like the Easter/Christmas church goers, which is not a judgemental statement just a reality that is foreign to us. Starting tomorrow we will have devotion time with our Father and our children again.
We have seen not-so-positive changes in our children due to our lack of investment in them. Not only through the lack of the Word of God but in our mission to "bring them alongside us in what we are doing"(~Josh Clark, great teacher, friend and blog). We have been sharing proximity more often than not but we have allowed busy-ness to interfere with the business of sharing and being. Their relationship with others recently, directly reflects our relationship with God right now and my heart is so heavy with grief. I know my God is here for me now and tomorrow, the same as 6 months ago and before, but our failure is real and reflective. I feel a little "icky" putting this out there, but I promised to always be real so there it is.....today I am a HOPEFUL FAILURE. Loved. Grieved. Already Forgiven.