The People Watcher

For this to make sense you may have to reference back to an older post of mine.
When it comes to conversation, I am so much better, one on one, or in a very small group of people(or on Facebook). Anyway, something I've learned about myself is that I am a serial people "watcher". When attending a party or even my husband's enormous family holidays, I am completely content to just sick back and listen, observe. It's not something I do intentionally and yes sometimes I do it judgementally..."I can't believe she just said that to her child!", "How many mirrors did she pass after she put that outfit on?" etc.... are some of the evil thoughts that cross my mind..Did I just admit that? yikes!! BUT BEFORE YOU JUDGE ME TOO HARSHLY, most of the time as I observe, the view is positive. I see ladies who make their rounds, speak to everyone and are the effortless floating social butterfly. And I'm jealous! I do a pretty good job of hiding this insecurity but it is real and restrictive. I wish I was made that way. That there weren't friends and acquaintances in my life, instead, friends and people I don't know. Two categories, that's it......Oh yea, I also hate meeting new people. Not the people, just the process, what to say, how to break the ice etc. So about a month ago, I mentioned to my friend Tessa (she didn't make it though because her sweet lil' baby was so sick)that we should get together with a few of the moms in our little community, regularly, consistently and grow those acquaintances into deepened friendships. Coffee, prayer, and some genuine face to face lady time! And it was GREAT!! We didn't talk about one spiritual thing, however we did LAUGH! I left feeling so encouraged. If I want friends who feel comfortable dropping in at any given time, no matter the condition of my house or my hair, I have to go beyond the usual hi's and hello's. I want acquaintances to become friends and awkward silences to be a thing of the past. I hope the connection with these ladies flourish and overflow into other areas in my life.
But this serial people watcher/caterpillar will have to grow into her wings...one cup of coffee at a time!! I truly cannot wait til next time.